conscious wellbeing for ourselves & our world
Who's calling the shots in our relationships? A perspective and response from Abraham-Hicks.
"When you do become adept at directing your thoughts to things that are pleasing, the unpleasing people (or unpleasing aspects of those people) will leave your experience. It is your attention to the unwanted that holds it in your experience." Abe-Hicks
Getting into the Vortex
Who Calls the Shots?
by Esther and Jerry Hicks
Is there a way of staying positive around “lackful” others? Here is Abraham’s reply to a student who asks: How can I remain positively focused when my mate (or boss, family, friend) is predominantly focused on lack and makes no effort to be positive? And it gets to me—it’s hard not to also feel lack.
You will discover that it is far easier to learn to direct your own mind than to arrange, through action, the people with whom you spend your time. Even if there is only one person who is with you often whom you need to train, you could not train him or her sufficiently. And, of course, there are many more persons than one to whom you are having an emotional response. When you do become adept at directing your thoughts to things that are pleasing, the unpleasing people (or unpleasing aspects of those people) will leave your experience. It is your attention to the unwanted that holds it in your experience.
Many people disagree about that when they first hear it, because they believe that negative things are in their lives because someone else is putting them there: “My abusive husband asserts himself negatively into my experience.” But we want you to understand that if you use your power of focus to withdraw your attention from the negativity or abuse, and put your attention upon positive aspects, instead—the abuse cannot remain in your experience. It is empowering to discover that any and all negative aspects stay in your experience only because of your attention to, and therefore continuing invitation of, them.
We acknowledge that holding positive thoughts in the midst of negative conditions is not easy. Especially in the beginning. The best time to begin to make the effort to direct your thoughts really is not when you are the middle of a negative situation. It will be easier for you to reach for better-feeling thoughts when you are alone: Begin by trying to remember when you did easily feel good about this person. And if you cannot find that beginning place, then choose another topic altogether.
The first thing that is necessary to break a negative trend and start it in a more positive direction is the acceptance that your thoughts do create the reality that you live. Next you must accept that you do have the power to direct your own thoughts. And then, what is required is a willingness to direct your thoughts in the direction of what feels better until that pattern is established within you.
One of the most exciting things about beginning the process of deliberately focused thought is that the Law of Attraction will bring you evidence of your improved thought immediately. And while old patterns may be hard to break, and you may slip back into those old patterns from time to time, the evidence of your effort will be undeniable to you. And, before long—with much less effort than you spend trying to dodge negative conversations, or train another into better behavior—all of your relationships will improve.
For more than 20 years, New York Times best-selling authors Esther and Jerry Hicks have tapped in to Abraham—the inspiring, heart-warming, stirring, thought-provoking and life-changing interdimensional voice that answers life’s most perplexing questions. And for more than 20 years and counting, they continue to take their message—The Law of Attraction—to all corners of the world to anyone who would listen.