Have you thought about what "happiness" is? Until recently, I've always thought that I'm a happy person when things are going the way they are supposed to go and that I'm miserable when things get hectic
and little more challenging than I'd like them to be.
If you think about it, this is a tricky proposition, as I will
be totally dependent on the life itself, or outside factors in general, to be happy or miserable. It seems to me that, if that's the case, I don't have much control over my mood.
But recently, I don't know how -maybe one of those miracle
effects of daily Qi Gong meditation I've been doing for a while- things started to change for the better. So now, whenever I have a negative feeling, such as stress or anger or frustration, instead of going down with those familiar feelings, I start asking some questions to myself.
You can probably
create better, more personalized questions for yourself, but my questions look like this:
- Why am I feeling this way at the moment?
- Have I felt this way before? (Is this something that I
repeatedly feel from time to time?)
- Do I have any control over what's happening?
- What would I like to do for fun right now?
At any moment of confusion, these questions are enough to get me
going on an internal journey, where I will discover specific things about myself. Overall though, what I will find is that what I think or what I believe affects my emotions, and therefore my mood. Each time, I realize that my thought patterns or belief systems (i.e. my life conditioning) that I have built up throughout my life time are directly impacting who I am.
I guess I don't need to change any of my thought patterns or
belief systems. They are valuable to me at times. However, through this self discovery, when I realize that they don't serve my higher good (in other words causing me misery), I'm ready to replace them with new ones that make me a better person and a happy one also.
As Kahlil Gibran said "We choose our joys and sorrows long
before we experience them." Once we start getting to know ourselves, our choices would be wiser and more joyful leading us to ultimate happiness.