I hate being like this. Though it is happening less and less and I know how to deal with it, it really p's me off.
I nearly went off the road this morning, the tears came from nowhere as I was driving into town.
Everything is toppling in on me. I just want to pack it all in - the new business, the house, etc etc.
I can't even remember if I took my tablets this morning. So many people want a piece of me, I have to go here, I have to do that, someone needs something, my head is splitting, no doubt my blood pressure is rising. I know this isn't going to last i know i should eft or meditate - I know it all, so why isn't it working. Why can't i just allow myself this time, maybe just to sit in solitude, read a book, relax. Even the dog makes demands of me, the garden too. Flowers wave in the wind demading to be watered, the lawn - hey hang on somebody mowed the lawn while I was out. Thats one job out of the way at least.
Okay I'm going to try and be grateful for a few things, it worked yesterday lets see if it will work today.
Being able to blog it out - it helps to just write it all down, it doesn't matter if it is not read. I've got it out of my system.
Grateful that I mustered up the energy to throw together dinner, lets hope its edible.
Grateful that there is one glass of wine left in the bottle - my treat for myself later in the evening.
See, its working.
Going to take a heavy duty painkiller soon, I'm allowed to take them occassionally and I try to steer away from them but the pain in my back and leg is getting worse so just this once I will take them.
Its nearly 5.00 p.m. and the sky is heavy, the weather definately has a nip in the air, its very autummy but I don't think there will be an amazing sunset like there has been the past two nights, I think tonight will be the flanny jami's and sheepkin slippers, maybe I won't have wine tonight - maybe I will have hot chocolate instead. Now thats a cheering thought - with marshmallows floated on top. Okay I am well and truly cheered up - going to dash out and get some drinking choclate powder and some marshmallows. Food does it every time, puts a smile on my face.